LOL Spam

Here's another installment of weird, funny, eye-roll-worthy subject lines from my spam inbox (all [sic] of course). I particularly like how they become increasingly volatile about some answer I haven't given. And that I'm apparently very ambiguous about either my gender or sexual orientation. Oh, well; enjoy!

1. Strains in relationship?
2. Asking you last time!
3. bovines
4. Your wife take deep
5. Her emotion will go off-scale!
6. pears
7. Need m-f-ing answer!
8. Mr., I need to know now
9. Become a sophisticated perfume? She'll adore your talent
10. Literally become a monster snake in my pants

(SB: "Literally.")

11. Let women excite you more
12. Turbines for your meat jet
13. Be so kind as to read this please
14. Monsters
15. I really like you.
16. Tom asked about you
17. dude, what's up?
18. Please
19. Tell me, what's this?
20. Our price: $

(SB: Sold!)

I think I need to make like, a t-shirt that's just a series of the one-word subject lines: 'Bovines, Pears, Monsters, Please...' Man. Now I really want that shirt. It's so damn irrelevant!

Feel free to share some of your funny spam messages with me in the comments, or shoot me an email and I'll publish them in the next round of LOL Spam.